Dr. Jonathan Ball, registered fraud and “real” doctor, searches the skies and the stars for nonsense to pass off as wisdom. Using the latest in horoscope technology, Jonathan knows the future so you don’t have to!

Don’t like your weekly horoscope? Although you get a new fortune on this site each Thursday, Jonathan also syndicates a weekly print version of the “Haiku Horoscopes” column with all-different fortunes!

Yes, each week he tells your fortune twice! Don’t think about the logic of that! Just be happy!

Why haikus? Isn’t it obvious? No? Hmm. Well, uh, because… this press conference is over!


You can also visit the temperamental Jonathan Ball, an award-winning creative writer, at his online home, www.jonathanball.com, or e-mail him at jonathan@jonathanball.com.