We all make mistakes
In our lives, but those you make
This week will end yours

The dirtiest of
Your secrets—your mud fetish—
Has now been revealed

Need a peaceful and
Quiet vacation spot? Try
The lovely Hill House

Travel back in time
And stop yourself from building
Time machines—Good job!

Do what Paul Simon
Says and buy some shoe-diamonds
—The ultimate bling

I have spoken to
God, and he’s never heard of
This “platypus” thing

This week the skies will
Open, and Jesus shall come
Back to get pizza

Don’t worry about
Things that you cannot change, like
Your hairstyle and clothes

The will of the gods
Is that you send me money
… They must be obeyed

Mercury’s rising
And Mars is in decline, so
Like, you know, watch out

The egg came before
The chicken, so you can move
On with your life now

The beauty of the
World will fill you with many
Quite lame emotions