The spell-checker in
My computer knows “Langdon”—
Democracy failed

Spend your honeymoon
In the unearthly hell of
The eighth dimension

It turns out you are
The reincarnation of
Some lame unknown dude

Need some quick money?
Try tying your wallet to
A cheetah! Hyuk!

The hanging sword of
Damocles would make quite a
Fine home addition

Your blood tests will come
Back ‘positive’ for tiny
Wolves in your bloodstream

I’m too hungry to
See the future—I just keep
Seeing sandwiches

Property values
In your neighbourhood drop once
You take possession

The joke’s on you—the
Chicken crossed the road to have
Sex with your lover

It’s a wonderful
Life that you lead in a state
Of great delusion

Sure, they might call you
Crazy, but just keep breaking
Skulls and eating brains

Dan Brown’s next novel’s
About a code Langdon finds
In Alphagetti