You’ll feel the worst pain
Of your life this week after
You give birth to wolves

If you keep running
From responsibility
You will escape it

It’s time—put into
Action your master plan to
Murder Beethoven

Soon your favourite
Chair will be taken by a
Guest, so end it all

The cows will come home
This week, so you’d better get
Some new hobbies soon

Start carrying a
Clipboard—at some point someone
Will salary you

No one will take you
Seriously until you
Complete clown college

You’re all talk and no
Sexy teenage action, so
I’m not renting you

If Jack Daniels knew
What he caused you to do he’d
Cease operations

Financial planning
Isn’t your forte—admit
This, return the beans

Time will heal all wounds
Aside from that wound there, your
Decapitation

Your world will shatter
This week when you realize
That wrestling is fake